To Young….

Today (Tuesday) I learned that another young life has been lost… A boy who was in 10th grade at my daughter’s school took his own life. Why? According to my daughter it was probably because of bullying. What really got me was that she said everyone is bullied at some point!! My first thought was what the hell!?!? Why? Why do school not do more? Why are kids so damn mean to each other? Don’t parents teach anything anymore?

I’m at a total loss.

Since my daughter has been in high school there has been a death each year. Freshman year another kid took his life because of bullying, last year a boy just never woke up, and then the one on Monday. Three young lives cut short. Three sons lost. Three families left grieving.

My daughter is upset. She knew this boy… she walked by him every day at school and talked once in a while to him. Today she told me that he reminded her of her little cousin because he had these big brown eyes and really long, dark lashes. She too is lost.

Of course the school has counselors and what not to help the kids deal with this situation as they do all the time. But what about the kids who are getting bullied? Who is there to help them? What about the kids who are bullying others? Who is there to tell them to knock it off or help them?

There are so many thoughts running through my head. Why didn’t he say something? Maybe he did and nothing was done or not done in a timely manner. Are the kids who are bullying just teasing and goofing around like kids tend to do and those on the receiving end just more sensitive then others? Why didn’t someone stand up for him? Maybe they did… maybe it didn’t make a difference. I have no answers for the hundreds of questions I that are swimming around inside my head.

The only think that I do know for sure is that he was to young. He was to young to die… I’m sure that he was a bright kid and and a great future ahead of him. I know that he has left behind a grieving family and friends. All of who have more questions then I do… and so many of them start with why.

I now worry that my kids are being bullied. I worry that they’re bullying other kids.

So how do we stop this? Can we stop it?

We won’t know until we try.

Talk to your kids. Get them to speak up when they see someone bullying another person. Tell them it’s okay to do it too, because sometimes there is fear of retribution or being called a tattle tale. They may be saving a life… the life of a friend.

Keep an eye on your kids for the signs of them being bullied. Yes, there are signs. Be involved with your children and with the school(s) that they attend.

I think that we need to teach our kids to be more open minded and accepting of other kids who may seem different from them. We need to teach them to befriend everyone and to set an example for other kids in their social circles. We need to teach them tolerance. We need to teach them kindness and love. We need to teach them fairness and that it’s okay to be different without fear of being bullied.

As parents we need to be there because ultimately we are the ones who set an example for our kids and teach them.

Have you had to deal with bullying yet regardless if your child was the bully or the one being bullied?