Some of us are more reserved, rarely touching other people.
And then a few of us hang out somewhere in the middle. Hugging our children, but limiting our affection to handshakes with others.
This week we would like you to write about how the show of affection has played a part in your memory.
Choose a time when either the abundance or lack of affection (either by you or someone else) stands out, and show us. Bring us to that time. Help us feel what you felt.
It was a cold day in early December and the snow wasn’t slowing down at all and where we lived that meant that if the plow trucks couldn’t keep up that they would just stop until the snow quit falling.
With this in mind the decision to stay was made. It was to risky to drive home and then have to turn around within 45 minutes at the earliest and go back.
Babies are unpredictable and you never know when they will make their grand entrance into this great, wide world.
My midwife assured me that everything would be fine and we decided to induce labor since I was already in the early stages and the baby was ready to be welcomed into the world.
I made all the phone calls to my family to let them know that their first grandchild would soon be born. But my words were heard by nobody. The answering machine took my message and would relay it to them.
The evening was passing and the my labor was progressing quickly…. to quickly for me and it hurt like hell.
I was alone. Well mostly alone. My boyfriend was there (not much help) and his mother (more helpful) was there too and my labor was hard & I hadn’t gotten that breathing thing down very well since I never finished my childbirth classes. I think that if it weren’t for her I wouldn’t have done very well.
I wanted to sleep so badly. Rest. That is what I wanted most of all next to seeing my beautiful baby.
Just after 1am I welcomed my first child into this world on a chilly December morning. She was the most beautiful & healthy baby I had ever seen.
Sleep came and all too soon the new day was upon us and I was snuggling with my baby in bed. Holding her close to me was the most wonderful feeling and one that can never be replaced. Even by another child as each child is special and unique in their own way.
Holding your baby is the most amazing feeling. Warm. Comforting. Safe. Love. Pure love. There are so many words to explain the feeling and at the same time it’s indescribable.
But I was still alone. Yes, my boyfriend and his family was still there with me to share in my joy and to marvel at the new life we all took turns holding in our arms. But my mom, my dad, my step mom, brother, sister… not there.
My family wasn’t there to hold & cuddle that pretty baby girl. They weren’t there to hug me. They weren’t there to congratulate me on a job well done and tell me how proud they were.
This left an empty feeling in me…. a hole in my heart. I wanted my family to be there with me for that special moment. A moment in our lives that can never be relived.